I've seen things in the past few weeks that just can't be unseen, and I have to say I'm really disturbed.
All my life I feel I have fought for respect, to be recognized as an individual and not someone else's property. Not just a woman but a person with intelligence and the innate right to make decisions about my own life and person.
But our society has been so ingrained with the traditional beliefs of woman being subservient, dismissive, pieces of property and for years I have put the responsibility on men to change their vision of women, but now I feel much differently.
The news has been flooded in recent months about sexual abuse. Abuse of anyone is wrong, just wrong. the hash tag # metoo began, but it was so short lived and frankly all I saw for the most part were very famous powerful woman coming forward. How will beliefs change if we all don't speak up?
#metoo. I am not looking for sympathy. just an opportunity to be heard. I was verbally and physically abused by someone I felt loved me completely. I really thought I was at fault for his behavior, until the day his physical assault became directed towards my children. I put myself between him and my son and took the last beating, I left the relationship. I am diagnosed with ptsd.
I also was harassed in my place of work. I was an I-EMT at Rural Metro Medical Services. walking into my shift a fellow male employee made a "pass" at me. I told him "you're married, leave me alone" his comment back to me, "you don't know my story" my reply "yes I do, you're married, your wife is the charge nurse at Community ED and has MS and you have children. Leave me alone"
upset by the exchange I commented on it to my partner that day, another part timer and he ran right to the man that harassed me. the next day I was called into the supervisors office and confronted. I was informed that I was spreading lies about the man and he was afraid if it got back to his wife it would cause problems. (duh) I was to shut my mouth or face a "sexual harassment" complaint and be terminated!
I wish I could say this was an isolated incident. But when you're a woman working in a traditional mans world there were more events like this than I can count and I endured it first because I really needed the job being a single mother and 2 because I felt it was the price to pay for being a woman in that world.
I know I'm not alone in this, I don't believe there is a woman out there that doesn't have a story of their own.
for the past few months I have been driving lyft/uber to make a little extra. What an eye opener!
I am not absolving men of their responsibility to be respectful and treat women equally, but frankly ladies how in the world do we ever expect change when we don't respect ourselves and believe in ourselves??
Last sat. night as I am driving, a young SU student wearing nothing but what is in the picture I attached, and I mean NOTHING!!! Completely see through lace thong and I mean dental floss thong, plunging teddy and 3 inch heals in 27F freezing cold was walking through campus. REALLY! another time it was a young lady whom had obvious breast enhancement (easily EE) with nothing more than the sheerest of a chiffon top on. And the short, cheeks completely hanging out shorts are completely the fashion statement with the tightest of skin tight tops and oh yeah... what is up with just wearing a bra and no top to a party??? short wedding dresses cheap
I'm sorry ladies but we have a responsibility, how do you expect any man to look at you and not assume that you are " not asking" for it????????
I see all of these young high school girls going to the prom in dresses that are skin tight, plunging neck lines, backless. and oh yeah mini, if they bend over you see everything. Moms what kind of message are we sending??? that our daughters are beautiful?? or that they are sexual??? desirable??? we have taught our daughters this and then when they go to school and they are out of your sight they take it to the extreme...
if we don't respect ourselves how is anyone else going to respect us. how do we change the world into believing that a woman with a brain, is beauty?
women, if you want the world to change, you have to change it. respect yourself first and others will respect you.
If a man is any kind of a man he will see your beauty through your heart, what you give to others and for believing in yourself.
if you go out looking like trash, you will be treated as trash.